Coaching - Questions to Ask

Within coaching there are key questions that unlock larger doors than their own size seems to justify. These are questions that really punch above their weight. Some are asked of the client. Some are asked of yourself as a coach:

• ‘Help me to understand . . .’ takes responsibility from first position for not yet having understood. No blame is attached to the other person.
• ‘Help me to understand what is going on with you right now.’ Although this is a request, it is received as a question. In order to explain to you what is going on right now, the client must first understand it themselves. This question triggers them into a less emotional and more logical view of their situation.
• ‘If you did know, what might it be?’ Ask this when your client says they do not know how to respond to a specific question. Often they cannot answer because they are blocking out or suppressing the answer. This question gives them permission to imagine what the answer is as if they are making it up, allowing the real answer to come out.
• ‘What do you need (from me) right now?’ This question makes the client connect with their true needs and allows them to express them.
• ‘What would be a good question for me to ask right now?’ This question works because it takes the coach to the most relevant areas of the situation. Also, it stimulates objectivity in the client.
• ‘What does this person/client need from me right now?’ This is a question the coach asks of themselves to give themselves direction.
• ‘And. . .?’ If you’re not sure which direction to go in, or if you feel there’s more the client needs to say.
• ‘Because. . .?’ enables the client to explore their rationale.
• ‘You want to leave this session at X pm having achieved what, exactly?’ enables the client to focus on successful outcomes within their time frame. (A less effective version of this might be: ‘What would you like to achieve, if that’s possible, within our time constraints?’)
• ‘What have you achieved, that you might not have been aware of at the time?’ enables a person to start filtering for what they have done that has worked for them.